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Five texts I hate to receive

By Tim Mack in Perspectives
September 15, 2011

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Photo courtesy of Google Images

Texting is a top form of communication in this day and age. The great thing about texting is that it is fast and achieved rather quietly. If ninjas were students, they would exchange information this way. In nearly every professor’s syllabus, there is a “NO TEXTING” policy, yet most students would admit to ignoring it. Additionally, we’ve all responded to a missed phone call with “shoot me a text,” or the even more direct “text me.” Instead of the phone call, which will consist of the useless pleasantries (“How are you?” “Nice to hear from you!”), we’d rather get straight to the point. This is a result of time being a scarce resource and people seeming to be constantly on the move. Even further, as the Internet continues to be the center of many people’s universe, many have begun to find talking in person to sometimes be a drag.  Therefore, texting is here to stay. Our elders will need to continue to learn the basics, as they also argue over whether we are communicating properly. With that being said, this is a list of five text messages I am annoyed to receive for many different reasons.

“K”

Despise it. First off, if you’re one of the few people who doesn’t have unlimited text messaging, it is a complete waste of money. In most cases it is a response to a question or instructions, that doesn’t need much of response (“Do you have my baseball?” “No.” “K”). With brutal winters in the north, and specifically Lock Haven, whipping out my phone for a “K” makes me want to pull out my hair. Not only does it seem lazy, but also there has almost never been an occasion where this response was appropriate. In fact, the only time someone sends just “K” as a text, is usually when they’re salty about something, which then makes me want to text them back and inquire as to why they felt the need to send me that arrogant response. I mean, dang, the least you could do was type “ok.”Extra hate points for when you receive “k” or “ok” after sending an expressive text that took a bit of time to type out—then you just want to slap them.

EXCESSIVE USE OF CAPITALIZATION

I use capitalization the appropriate way: as the first letter of a sentence and when “I” dines alone. Anything more is obnoxiously childish. So for the children who continue to text, IM, write Facebook statuses, or tweets with all caps, I hate you.  Why? BECAUSE: A. IT SEEMS LIKE YOU ACCIDENTLY LEFT YOUR CAPS LOCK ON AND YOU DON’T BOTHER TO LOOK UP TO READ WHAT YOU’VE WRITTEN and B. IT SEEMS LIKE YOU’RE YELLING AND NO ONE LIKES TO BE YELLED AT. So don’t text like that—unless you’re yelling.

I WAS JUST THINKING OF YOU.

Clearly you were thinking of me—that’s why you sent me a text. And unless I actually like talking to you or we have some sort of rapport that means you need to be thinking of me, this text message is just awkward to receive. Usually when we get it, it’s not from a person that we want to be thinking about us which makes it that much more unpleasant. What am I supposed to say back to that? Thanks? Cool? Can’t say I was thinking about you? Rule of thumb, if the person doesn’t really talk to you much, save yourself the awkwardness and only text them if you have something to say.

WE NEED TO TALK

This text is overly dramatic and similar to “I was just thinking of you”—a desperate cry out for attention. Oh, we need to talk, eh? Texts like this build up anticipation because generally, it means something bad is about to be said–precisely why men hate it when women say it to them. If you really need to talk to me, call me—and if it’s super important, come find me (Wedding Crashers reference a bit). Honestly, we all have larger issues in our lives, so when I see things like this, I get very worried and usually, it’s all unwarranted. No one is dead. No one is hurt. The issues truly in the grand-scheme of things are…trivial. Every. Time.

DID YOU GET MY TEXT?

This one is simply awkward. The other luxury of texting is I can respond whenever I please. As a result of you sending me this text, I feel pressured to respond to you. Um, please control your insecurities and be patient for my response. I don’t necessarily mean to rude, but in many cases I am busy and haven’t been able to get to it.  If I don’t respond back, will you assume that I gave you the wrong number? And if you’re truly feeling gusty, then just call me.

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