April 3, 2014
You know what really ruffles my feathers? The one-way cellphone friendship. We all have that friend, you know, the one that is always on your rear-end about hanging out or talking more because “they miss you.” Where are their texts, calls, Facebook posts, tweets? Nowhere to be found.
Week-after-week you get the third degree guilt-trip because you never have time for said friend, but when have they ever gone out of their way to get ahold of you to make plans? Why is it strictly one person’s responsibility to text or call all of the time to set up plans? What ever happened to taking turns? One week one friend sets the plans, the next week the other one does it. How about just compromising and working things down to a plan you can both agree on? If one of you can’t hang out, what’s the big deal?
We all get busy; just wait until the next week. Just because you are friends does not mean you need plans every week. But it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try either. And another thing: don’t lay some guilt trip on your buddy just because they can’t hang out with you or seem distant, as long as they regularly try. They could be dealing with a lot of problems of their own. No matter how serious or how trivial, problems are problems. Maybe this time around they don’t necessarily want or need your input.
Cut your friends some slack and just be understanding when they can’t hang out or talk. If you’re critical during these times, it could be driving your friends away and you could be the reason none of your friends are reaching out to you. So please, next time you come to one of these points with a friend, just take it easy. Find something else to do and if they truly are your friend, then they will come back to you when they have dealt with the obstacles keeping them from freedom. And if you find your friendship to be too one-sided, talk to your “friend.” If they don’t change, just let them go. But do not ever lay down a guilt trip; it won’t get you anywhere and you might just ruffle some feathers.